Being apart of many hair forums, groups, sites ect. and seeing many begin their transitions to becoming natural, many motivated by other group members, I often thought of it myself. It truly bothered me as to why I wouldn't do it, aside from the fact that my husband wouldn't like it very much, what was it in me...am I truly dependant upon my hair? Am I victim of "self hate"? When I tell you that this bothered me....IT REALLY DID BOTHER ME!!! lol...Today combing my hair into a high bun it just hit me: "I LOVE CHEMICALLY STRAIGHTENED HAIR!!!" (this is literally the sentence that went through my head) LOL. I simply love it, I love my hair just the way it is. I was relaxed at 5 (nothing to brag about, but it's the truth) this is how I know and love my hair. I stretch my relaxers so I have an idea of my curl pattern or "type", but it just is what it is, I love straight hair. Not to say that I don't like natural hair, bc I youtube natural hair care, follow natural hair care blogs, oogle at women with beautiful natural tresses....but that is where it stops, our hair in it's natural state is extremely beautiful, but I prefer my hair to be straight. I think of it as looking at a woman with huge boobs (I am a 36 B...a small 36 B lol) Sure she looks good in those nice clevage showing shirts, but I enjoy being able to get away with being bra-less sometimes lol, I don't want to carry the weight of those things, and more importantly, I'm happy with my "B cup" even if I may glue a picture of my head on top of a pic of a model with DD's lol.
What I realized is I like the natural "look", I don't have the passion or motivation to be natural, and that is perfectly fine. If anything at all I was becoming a victim of "self peer pressure".
Let me just tell you realizing this has lifted a TON of weight off of my shoulders, I just felt a huge rush of "joy" go through me, with the simple realization that it's okay to love realxed hair.
People joke(or seriously) call it "Creamy Crack", they speak of how bad it is for your hair...but how many of those people smoke, drink, eat junk, don't exercise, and are over weight (not saying that all natrualistas are, I just mean ppl in general) but my point is not everything we do is good or necessarily "healthy" for us, but we do what makes us happy, and either deal with the consequences, or compensate to balance out the pros with the cons.
That's my "Ah Ha" moment for today, and it felt so good I just had to write a post on it.
HHJ Ladies
"relax, relate, release" as whitley gilbert would say! lol. I completely understand needing to vent about that from time to time. your high bun is SUPERRRRRRRRRRR CUTE! I love it!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much Hun!!! & Thanks for reading!!!!
ReplyDeletePraise the Lord the Gospel truth no lie!
ReplyDeleteI bet you those same People eat food with preservatives, smoke,drink and all kinds of stuff. and we can't Relax? LOL yeah ok. I love this. I'm following now :) this is Tracie Beloveliness btw.
I prefer relaxed hair myself. I like being able to change it from super curly to waves to straight without a lot of work. I hate the term "creamy crack" I am not addicted to relaxer, I could stop relaxing if I wanted to. I stretch my relaxer so I am used to dealing with my natural texture, nappy edges don't bother me.
ReplyDeleteGreat post. I remember having these same feelings at one point. I do see lots of members transitioning now. While I applaud them I am perfectly comfortable with my relaxed hair. I've managed my hair up to 6 months post and I am 6 months post now. I love my NG. I feel like relaxing after a long stretch is a great way/reward to see my progress. I have been at my relaxed hair journey way too long to just transition. I have to see my goal length. I have to "swang" it. I'm nowhere near mentally prepared to start over again.
ReplyDeleteCocoonedButterfly I totally agree with you :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks LaQT!! I'm glad it's not just me...I am so with you, I can not transition until after I see what my relaxed hair can do!! Another reason is bc I know that my transition wouldn't be permanent, and I don't want to cut my hair for a phase ya know. I love relaxed hair...and thats just that lol embrace it!!